Family and House Work

We are getting hit hard with snow AGAIN! We had about 4 inches when I woke up at 6:30 this morning, and it is still coming down hard at 3 in the afternoon. They say it will stop tomorrow morning leaving us with a good foot!

My weekend was good. I had the grandkids on Friday night. They were both sick with colds, so we just took it easy and enjoyed each other.

On Sunday, My mother in love came and we all had KFC, along with cake and cupcakes for dessert. We played a game of Phase 10..........NEVER "skip" your mother in law! Yeesh! I got a look that would kill! She is serious about her cards, but it did not help her, as she lost COMPLETELY! Her and Sweetheart both! OK, so I lost too, even though I had an incredible partner in TJ. Our son beat us all!Emerson enjoyed watching us for most of the game. She led Charlotte around the house the rest of the time. She did color Grandma a picture for the frig....They LOVED Sassy. TJ thought she was a toy at first and was shocked to see she was real. Emerson said, "niiiiice" and stroked her gently. Sassy was fine with them too! She has continued to be a joy to everyone here. She has her spot where she naps during the day....on the kitchen chair.But her favorite place is still on my lap. Here she is waiting for me to sit down....she looks like she wants to say, "I'm waiting.....you can sit down now."Once I do, she works her claws in my lap (softly, so it does not hurt), gets her motor going and curls up against me.Our school days are moving along. Anya, the neighbor girl I home school, is doing phenomenal! Charlotte is also doing exceptionally well this quarter. Zach has had some frustration, but I think moving his schedule around to make math his last subject instead of his first has helped greatly. He did a beautiful job today. I have to remind him to "sit on your butt" during handwriting, or he is very sloppy. Today after several reminders to sit on his butt, his workbook asked him to write a word that starts with "b". What did he write???I have felt the need to get my own schedules back in order. Since Sweetheart has been home they have all fell to the wayside. It makes me feel "out of control". I pulled out my Home Management Binder.....I love that thing. An extended family member once said that only an idiot would need to have a book to tell you when and what to clean. Well. I am that idiot. I am not a cleanie by nature....I need order, but have no natural skills to get it. The binder does it for me. However, the binder is a 2 inch think, very heavy, tool that is awkward to cart around....I decided to pull all my housekeeping pages out and make a smaller binder. I had a 1/2 inch binder and made a new cover. Now this is much easier than the heavy, bulky, binder, that I still keep handy, as it hold some valuable pages that I use often. This is my DAILY binder. It holds daily/weekly/and monthly chores.
I put a zipper pocket in it to hold pens and paper.

The first page is my "theme" verse...... And my schedules are in order after that.
I am happy to have these schedules back in place. Now I can quilt without guilt!!! And hey!!! ALL this laundry got done today!

Schedules

Anyone who has been reading this blog for more than a month, knows I am BIG into schedules. My children thrive on them, and so do I. I have gotten some criticism, especially within my own extended family, but it works for me. One Christian Mom asked in a blog post this morning about schedules. I told her I would share mine. If you are not familiar with scheduling, it can be overwhelming. I have learned alot on the subject through many different blogs. I took a little from each and formatted what works for us. Here it is (again for my older readers). This is the NEW Master Schedule for me and the kids. It was made to meet the needs of our upcoming home school year. I keep it in the front of my Home Management Binder.I have been hanging out with my Aussie friends...I spelled organized with an "s" instead of a "z"! The Master Schedule is the only one that has actual times on it. These are guidelines, and time goals, but in no way does everyday follow that exact time frame. If you have nothing to aim for, you will miss it every time!

Each child has their own "schedule" to help them stay on track. The Master Schedule is still THE schedule, but this makes them feel like they have some control. They actually helped with what went on their own schedules, as you could guess by looking at Zach's list. Here is an example. These hang on their bedroom walls.

On the Master Schedule, where it says "Morning Routine", those things are listed on each "personal" schedule. They include, shower, teeth, making your bed, etc. They also have an evening routine. I have my own routines in my binder.
The children also have their own "school schedules" in their school bins. Note, there are no times listed, though the time goals are on the Master Schedule. The time thing can be used against you, but it can also be a great tool to keep the kids on track.
There it is One Christian Mom! What works for one family will not work for another. Schedules will only work if they are adapted to fit the needs of your own household.
Today, I plan to declutter the coat closet. We house games and puzzles there, and it is time to move them to a more suitable place. I plan to work on my book list for school, and do some sewing on the next Sunbonnet Sue. My plan for a block a day fell apart.
The kids got gift cards to Toys R Us from my Aunt Robin. Instead of spending them individually, they decided to put their money together to buy this...

They are both so excited. I am certain it is not high quality for the price, but if you are 7 and 11, it is perfect!
Have a blessed day!

Blessings and Binders

I have a couple of blessings to share. First, I realized yesterday, I am no longer having food cravings! This is HUGE!!! I had made double fudge, chocolate chunk brownies for Niki and Rob, and I did not even want one! Now I have one of my all time favorites in the house...."Fruit of the Forest" pie. I love any fruit pie, but berry pie is my all time favorite. Nope. No desire. PLUS, I am only 2 pounds away from another yard of fabric! I have lost 12 pounds in 5 weeks and have not had an antacid in as long. Making goals and hitting them. It is a blessing!

The big brown UPS truck brought me another blessing yesterday! I won the 2nd prize in Cat's recent giveaway. I can not imagine what 1st prize was!!! She sent me the most gorgeous yellow vintage apron! Lots of scallops and pretty rick rack. I LOVE it!!!
Also, a can of Mrs. Meyer Lemon Verbena powder scrub. My sinks are smelling great!!! Along with something for Miss Charlotte...an awesome book on girl power/God power, and some yummy Mango flavored lip gloss. She was thrilled!! You are so sweet Cat, and we thank you!!!
I spent yesterday doing my homemaking dailies and working on my home school planning. In the process, I decided to work on my Home Management Binder. I had been wanting to do a new cover. It looks almost the same, but different graphics.
See that flower in the lower left hand corner? My little TJ brought me that flower, which was a hot pink petunia, just before he turned 2. It is the first flower he ever brought me. I keep it there always. Speaking of TJ, he came today and watered Grandma's garden.

Say CHEESE, TJ!!!

Ok, back to the binder...I was planning on adding a home school section.
First I needed to re-do my Master Schedule. With the change in my kid's grade level and the way we are going to do school, I needed to tweak this. I have it all set up to meet our new needs.
We are not slaves to this schedule, but it is a guide to keep us on track. Very helpful in steering a wayward 7 year old back to where he is suppose to be. It can backfire on you though. I have been told many times, "Mom, it is on the schedule!"

While working on the new Home School section, I realized I needed something different. It is one thing to open my 3 inch HMB everyday to follow my household details, but for home school I needed something more compact. I decided to create a Home School Binder.

It is 1 inch thick and very portable. I think I am going to be pleased with it. I can keep it in my bin and pull it every morning. It is still a work in progress, but so far it contains our daily school schedule (I showed those yesterday)...

The main heart of the binder is the Weekly Studies Planner, where I will have that weeks home school planned out down to the books and references we will use.

Each child has a section where their personal information will be kept. This includes assignments assigned and completed, and their individual book lists. After they complete their reading, the books will be recorded in their section.Each subject has a section along with a "Resource" section. I think I will add a "Wish List" section to record books that we want to order.
Planning is time consuming and sometimes difficult, but so worth it in the long run!!! Now off to complete my Thursday dailies in my cute yellow apron!!!!

Blessings~ Bren

Schedules

Some women have a binder, some keep their schedule in their computer, some in a recipe box. Some women use a notebook and create a new schedule everyday or every week, calling it a "to do list". Some women do not require a schedule at all. To those women I give applause. I graciously accept their ability to do what is required with minimal or no forethought. I think most of these women do not have children at home, a homeschooling day to plan, prepare, or execute, a husband who has very high standards, or the busyness I face everyday. I say most, because there are some, a rare few, who can and do, do it well. I am not one of them.

When my boys were young, I used a flipper file described in "The Messie's Manual" As long as I followed it, it worked for me. Laundry has always been an issue for me. I hate to do it and it occasionally piles up on me. Not as often as it use to, but I do remember a time when I would buy bags of socks for my boys because they were out. Hmmmm. Once I counted and my oldest son had 52 pairs of white socks. I am very real here. I do not pretend to be a great organizer. It is not a natural thing for me. That said, I am also not a fool, nor am I ADHD. I do not have a learning disability, and I can think rationally (no offense...I have 3 children who have at least 3 of the conditions I just mentioned...no, one of them is not a fool). I am not an idiot who needs to have it written on a daily schedule to take a shower and get dressed. OK, so it is written down. It is not written down because I might forget....it is written down as a commitment to myself. The other day, we took a day off. That is something we do once in a while. I did not get dressed until 2 pm. I never fully woke up and NOTHING got done that day. The motivation to quilt, sew, play a board game, read a book, was just not there. That is ok once in a while, but because I have this morning routine written down and in a page protector in my binder, it is a commitment I have made to myself. How often do I look at this page in my binder? Never. I should look at it more often as it is a pretty page and it was well planned out. I know I need to run my dishwasher at night in order to maintain my routine. In the past, it would not get run, not because I needed to be "told", but because it was not a routine. The end result would be a dishwasher full of dirty dishes in the morning and breakfast dishes sitting in the sink until well after lunch because the dishwasher needed to run it's cycle, cool off, and be emptied. Now, you rare folks out there who do not need a schedule are thinking, "Yeesh!!! Use your common sense." Well, my commonsense, though well in tact, is usually busy thinking about the other things that need it's attention at that particular moment.

So once my boys got older and things were pretty much in empty nest phase around here, I did not use my flipper file. The need was not there. Then, along came Charlotte and Zach. I am now (then) 40 years old and in a whole new mindset. My time is my own and I have lots of it....for about a minute! Things quickly spun out of control. The house was always a wreck. Laundry piled everywhere, dinners thrown together a half hour before we were to eat, no order, and 2 "special" kids who had more energy than any 2 I had ever seen before in my life. When Charlotte was 5, my days were so chaotic with behaviors, that I felt insane most days. No order to anything and I blamed her. She had spun my life out of control. After Zach came along, I decided a schedule was needed. It was not the strict schedule I have now, but I saw an instant change in Charlotte's behavior. She thrived on a schedule. Zach too.

Why this post? There has been several opinions in blogland lately about scheduling and how there really is no need for it. Use your commonsense. I actually had a family member say in front of me to other family members, "You have to be an idiot to need a piece of paper tell you when to vacuum. You do it when it needs it!" Does having my schedule make me an idiot? I don't think so. I actually think it makes me very wise. I know my limitations and work to make my life easier. I know my daily schedule by heart now. I rarely look at these either.... My detailed cleaning lists are still new and I do look at these often. Here is a confession....with spring break the last few days, I have slacked in the laundry area again. This morning Sweetheart asked, "Where are my socks?" I said, "Oh, I am sorry, they are in the basket on top of the washer. Are you out of socks?" He replied, "Yeah...what's it been like 10 days since you did the laundry???" Now, he was just joking, and said that with a wink, because he knows it is a downfall for me. He has a very dry sense of humor. No matter, he knows after that little joke that all of his socks will be in his drawer when he gets home. What would he say if they weren't?? Nothing. He would just dig more out of the basket of clean ones on the washer, just like he did this morning. This is not how it is meant to be on a daily basis. Once in a while I fail the schedule, but it is there when I jump back on. I am not it's slave...it is my tool. A tool I use to keep my life and the lives of my family running smoothly. Eliminating chaos and confusion.

In reading a blog post by my friend Copperswife this morning, she wrote,

"I know many women don't have a need for keeping such extensive records and schedules at their fingertips. Perhaps they do not, or no longer, homeschool. Perhaps they are empty-nesters and/or retired. Perhaps they are even single women. However, I know that in order for me to keep on top of things in my very busy home, I must have routines and schedules, all of my thoughts recorded, and all of my notes and records in one place." (used with permission)

Isn't she gracious??? I am not so tactful! I just don't want to apologize for needing a schedule to keep my home running smoothly. Not to my extended family, nor to anyone in blogland. Another one of the sections I have in my binder is an "Inspiration" section. Here I have "A Wife's 10 Commandments" printed. They are great advice for a Godly wife to follow. There are 2 in particular that speak to me personally concerning keeping a written schedule. They are...

#4 "You shall work heartily as directed by the Lord and your husband, not by your own ideas of what should be done. You shall not be so busy working that you neglect to get alone time with God everyday. During this quiet time, you shall pray diligently for your husband. Be willing to put aside work in order to "play" when your husband asks you to."

#10 "You shall not covet another woman's husband, children, friends, house, looks, wardrobe, possessions, talents, gifts, ministry, or any other thing that is hers; but you shall be content with all God has given you."

Now this is not quoted scripture...it is advice from another woman (I have no idea to "credit" here.). Here these speak to me in a couple of ways. First, #4 tells me that my way is not the way I should be doing things. I need to seek what God and my husband say about the standard and care required for my home. Yours will be different than mine. I have a friend who's husband really does not care if the bathroom gets a regular cleaning or if the kitchen floor has crumbs. My husband does. Are you screaming inside, "Then let him do it!!!"? I have yelled that myself...and so he does. That feels worse to me than doing it myself! Now #10...I will not covet another woman's ability to keep her house running smoothly without a schedule. I will not look at her as better than me, nor will I think less of a woman who needs a schedule twice as rigorous as mine is. I will not covet her ability to delegate duties to her family, when I feel compelled to do them myself. I will however, learn from other women and be willing to look at myself with eyes wide open and recognize when something is not working for me. I will not covet my friend's husband...his contentment of the home being "lived in" verses my own husband's desire for a very tidy, clean, orderly home. I will recognize my shortcomings without comparing myself to women who are naturally organized.

There! I said it! Think me a fool, or an idiot, or whatever else you want. I do ask that you keep any hateful e-mails to yourself. Let's be gracious in our opinions of each other.

Now I must go switch my laundry around before I need to run to Walmart for new socks!!!

Focus Cleaning

This has been a week of getting back into the routines that make my household flow. Somedays the flow is smoother than others. Kyle is doing great. No seizures and his meds are being tolerated with no side effects. He is bored and wants to go back to work. This morning the call came. He can return to work on Monday. I feel my life, and his, returning just thinking about it. He has had nothing since June of 07. Anyway, routines. They are so important in my house along with schedules. My unique family thrives on schedules and structure. Not that things are held so tightly there is no room for change, but something in place that tells us what is to be done and when...what to expect. Traumatized children feel safe when structure and schedules are established. If you have a traumatized child (or if you were one) you will find setting up a schedule and routines to be very helpful.

On Tuesday, my schedule told me it was the day the bedrooms were to be dusted, vacuumed and sheets changed. Basic surface cleaning. I opened my blinds to let some sunshine in the room and what did I find? A dead fly. Legs curled up, laying on his side with dust collecting on his corpse. What did this tell me? It told me that my focus cleaning schedule was not working for me. I already knew this. The previous set up had me doing monthly jobs like window sills and baseboards all in the same week, once a month. It was not functional. I spent one week a month doing all the baseboards in the house instead of concentrating on all the focus cleaning in a room or area of my house. So all my baseboards were clean that week, yet the ceiling fans were dirty. I wanted a system where each room got an entire deep clean once a month. I spent the last few days doing just that, and even though I need to tweak it a little bit, it is in place and up and running. I used Flylady's zone method, mixed with Messie's Manuel scheduling, and some Copperswife tips. Her daily article is now up on her website. Check it out if you have not already. I updated my post on my Home Management Binder to show all these pages added to my binder. You can find them by clicking on the link. Here is week 3, which is next week, just to give you an idea.

There are still big jobs that need to be done, but those are seasonal and will be added as I work on that section. I will be able to cross that off my goal poster in the next little while here.

This week was spent getting the laundry caught up, which as of today, is DONE. Charlotte did some extra chores to earn some more money onto her allowance. This was done without me asking!! She is a good girl. During the 2nd week of the month, my laundry room gets a deep clean. Since I did not have this section together in enough time to do all the focus cleaning for the week, I thought I would at least do this room. My laundry room, if you remember, is not a room at all. There are louver doors that open off the back hallway from the kitchen. My washer and dryer just fit in the space, so there is no walking room. I have plenty of space in the hallway so it is not difficult. Because of this, there is no room for a wastebasket. I hang a Thomas Kincade plastic bag on a hanger, hanging from the shelf for a waste basket. This was full and needed to be emptied. I used Hazel (my vacuum) to get rid of all the cob webs from the ceiling and walls. The attachments are great and allowed me to reach the 9 foot ceiling. Another special attachment had a groove in it that was perfect to clean the dust (and there was alot!) from the wire shelving. I used the attachments to reach along the sides of the machines and in the back as much as I could. Pulling the machines out and cleaning behind and under them will be a seasonal job. Probably Spring and Fall. I washed down the machines (they do not match, but they are both clean!) and got all the gunk from inside the washer that seems to collect there. I got rid of a couple of empty bottles, straightened out the shelves, and cleaned the picture frames. Then I cleaned the dryer's lint trap. Once a month you should scrub this with soap and water even if it looks clean. Here is a tip that will tell you if your trap needs it. If you run hot water through it and water pools, it needs a good scrubbing. Mine needed it. Good as new and the water runs right through the screen.I also keep a clothes basket on top of the washer or dryer to collect dirty kitchen towels, napkins, aprons and table cloths. My laundry room gets a regular straightening out every Saturday, but this deep clean will make that job much easier for a few weeks. Schedules. They are so important here. I think without them I would get nothing done. Many people comment here about how organized I am . I am not sure that is true. A truly organized person would not need the lists and schedules it takes for me to maintain my home. I do acknowledge my need for a system. That does not make me weak, but smart! If you can maintain your home without lists or schedules, then that is great. If you struggle, then you, like me, need a system.

Another thing we did this week was to create book baskets for the kids. Their baskets contain books for fun and for learning. We work together to choose books that are acceptable for school and also fun and interesting for them. Here is Charlotte's book basket. And Zach's book basket. Zachary has been having a hard time with math. He is very tired of it and is not at all challenged. I decided to skip ahead and he is loving it again. That kid always lights up my day with his wit. He made a comment to me the other day about needing to live his life. I looked at him with a question mark on my face and he said, "You know Mom, I am going to get married and have a family some day. I do have a life to live." This was in response to me asking him to pick up a mess he had made with a game. I told him I thought he had time to pick up that game before he needed to live his life!

I received a couple of awards this week and I have not forgotten. I am just thinking about them and who I will pass them onto. Most of the blogs I read already have them, so it is tough. I don't want to let them die though. I will think about it and get back to you!

I am going to have a cup of tea and visit with Sweet Hubby just as soon as I tuck the kids in bed. I am a big coffee drinker but I found this tea and it really helps fill that dessert void. It is called English Toffee, but tastes just like a cinnamon roll. No calories, carbs, or fat. Perfect.