The Face of Trauma Revisited

Here is where I cling!!! It is that season....the one I dread. The one that brings with it a warfare so intense that I am left battle scarred through Thanksgiving. This year there is an increased intensity. I am not sure why, but it is solid evil I face. The neighborhood decorations are even at a higher level of evil....like I have never seen before.
My children are responding. Yes, even Zach is showing signs of the season. I can almost smell the brimstone and sulfur that must be carried on the feet of those principalities sent to attack my daughters mind. She is attacked. This season, to a higher degree than usual. I sit here and hear the words of a man we met several years ago. It was during this season when we met him....he did not know us or anyone who knew us. Just a simple man of God we were going to hear speak a revival message. He shook my 5 year old daughter's hand with a smile. His smile faded and as he looked at me, a sincere concern showed in his eyes. "Legions.", he said. "You are dealing with legions here." Was he saying my daughter is possessed? NO!! Heaven forbid!! He explained to me after the meeting that she is tormented by legions. Legions, according to Websters dictionary, means "A great number". It is not something I did not already know....just a conformation. So, this year, once again, I check my armour (Ephesians 6:10-18). My helmet of salvation is secure. My belt of truth is being tightened! My breastplate of righteousness is being repositioned and polished. My feet are shod in the preparation of the gospel. My shield of faith is being traded for a larger one (Did you know you can do that?). My Sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God, is being sharpened!
I am in battle, though the battle does not belong to me....

it belongs to the Lord!

Here is a re-post of Charlotte's halloween trauma, written the day before halloween 2007.

First I want to thank all of you who reached out with your comments and e-mails on my first installment of The Face Of Trauma. My heart swelled with the love that was shown through warm words and thoughts. I was amazed at the e-mails I received where some of you shared your own trauma. It helped me to see that Charlotte and other children like her have a chance to live wonderful lives in spite of their past hurts. I need to preface this post with a warning that the content is difficult to take. Please, do not let any children read this.

Tomorrow is October 31st. In some parts of the world, it already is. I grew up with the innocence of halloween. My sister and I dressed up and put on costumes and went door to door, trick or treating and collecting candy. During my trick or treating years, it was becoming the "trick" to put razor blades in apples and nails in brownies...back then you got alot of fruit and homemade goodies. Mom was so careful to check everything before we ate it. It should have been a sure sign that evil was strong on that night. As a teenager, my treat days were over, but I found myself playing halloween tricks. We would soap windows and throw eggs and TP trees. Did you know that, Mom? I married and had my boys and have lots of halloween pictures of them too. My feelings about halloween became different when I became a Christian, though I still took my kids out trick or treating, I passed out candy and specially designed tracts explaining the way to God. I wonder how many of those tracts got read?

Now... Let's talk about what halloween is to me now. I have knowledge of halloween that I never had before. Part of me wants to forget what I know and go back to just NOT knowing. In doing that, I would have to deny and make of no consequence some of my daughter's most horrific memories. I will tell you, I do not know what she experienced herself on the halloween when she was 3, but I can tell you she was involved in some pretty terrible things. Have you wondered why I call the vampire, the vampire? Well, it is not a comical little nickname I gave him. It is because he is a blood drinker. Charlotte's biological womb and vampire were/are open Satan worshippers. They belonged to a "coven" (my daughter's word) that is still in operation today. Let me share with you some of what I KNOW to be true about this coven (I probably know 10% of what goes on there). I do know that animals, primarily rabbits and squirrels are sacrificed and the blood is shared directly from the cavity of the animals body. Sometimes it is drained into a glass, but this coven I believe were hillbillies (not the nice kind). What do I classify a hillbilly? Someone who instead of washing a dinner plate will flip it upside down to eat off the back. No joke. My baby could not understand why we did not just turn the plate over and use it again! I am getting off track here.

Another kind of sacrifice in this particular coven is live human sacrifice. Here is how it goes. A baby is born at home. No record of birth, never a doctors visit. If the baby is a girl, she is safe (for that day), if the baby is a boy, he is taken to the coven meeting and is blood sacrificed in the name of Satan. How? Here are excerpts from a 4 year old girl, "He is naked and has a black belly button. He is cut from his neck to his private. He stops crying after he is cut. They take something out of him and everyone takes a bite. It is scary." (this was all reported...nothing could be done) I thank God I have my Zachary!!! I can not control the urge to get on my knees and pray for my daughter's mind. That the pictures in her head would be replaced with pictures of fields of flowers and sunsets.

I told you the baby girl, because she was a girl, was safe. Well, on halloween, when she grows a little bit, she will no longer be safe. Her body will be used, not as a blood sacrifice, but as an offering to pure evil. Men and older boy children will use her up til she is ripped not just in her body but in her soul. Her parents will be honored and put in a place of high esteem for their offering. These rituals take place all year long, but ALWAYS on halloween night. I am sorry to ruin your fun and you can still take your kids out trick or treating because in your mind this is not what it means to you, BUT, please understand it IS happening, right here in middle America. Pray for these children who will, tomorrow night, be used as an offering to the evil that their parents worship. I planned to share the history of Halloween and it's origin, but I found a post here that does it better than I ever could. I also invite you to visit a post where an awesome woman of God describes one of her own halloween nights.

My Charlotte, just like the awesome woman of God, has a very troubling time during the fall season. During the first several years here, Charlotte would make herself bleed from her nose. It was a form of self soothing and copying the rituals she was so involved in. She no longer practices that ritual, (as far as I know) and has gotten better each year. Still, when I see the trees clothed in beauty, she sees images of little animals being cut. When I see pumpkins and fall decorations, she sees flashes of a halloween night 7 years ago. Lift her up in prayer also on this day. She told me just the other day "My other parents gave me to the devil". It is all still there for her. In a couple of weeks she will begin to calm in her spirit and things will gradually get better. I ask you to pray for me also. My own heart holds bitterness at this time of year. If the sight of an Autumn tree causes flashbacks for Charlotte, you can imagine what halloween decorations do to her. I want to go to the home across the street and ask them to give up their own innocence of halloween as the massive decorations they put out every year, and the mock graveyard they create, causes turmoil in my daughter's spirit every time she goes outside. I know I have no right to do that, nor would they understand. They would probably decorate their yard with a "For Sale" sign if I shared this with them. I will share this with you though. Your halloween innocence, with your witch and vampire type decorations, may be causing trauma to a child OR an adult who suffered ritualistic abuse. I know your intent is all fun and you would NEVER knowingly do this, but you can not be held responsible for what you do not know. NOW you know.These posts are difficult for me to do, but I find them necessary. Charlotte knows I am sharing her trauma with you. She is happy that the truth is being exposed, though she does not read these posts, as much of the information came when she was 4. Her memories are fading, I want them to continue to go. Then why is this information so vital?

The only way to break the darkness is with the LIGHT!