Thursday, October 25, 2007

"Your Pride Prohibits You"

What an awesome reminder that He is there to direct us when we are not quite sure where to go. Now most of us see only the last part of that verse....He will direct your path. Do not forget the first part. It tells us that He will direct our path if we trust in Him and acknowledge Him in all our ways, not leaning on what we know and understand. I forget that part alot and then ask "Why am I over here when He should have me over there?" It is because I did not acknowledge Him, nor lean on Him, instead of what I know. Very recently, God told me "Your pride prohibits you." Now, most of you know that I am pretty hard on myself and that can appear as humility. It is infact PRIDE. I focus so much on myself and my short comings that I do not acknowledge HIS ways. How can you acknowledge Him if you are so busy focused on how you could do better here or there? Anytime the focus is "self" there is pride involved. Now that is not to say that taking time to reflect on self is, it is responsible, but to put the focus there is a matter of pride. Through this second journey of parenting, I have spent many hours dwelling on what I could do better, where I am failing, how I can "fix" things. All the while I was leaning on my own understanding. Notice all the "I"'s? I, I, I!!! God has brought me to the realization that He did not place these children here because I am this awesome knowledge filled Mother who is to be the salvation of these poor pitiful orphans. No. He placed them here because He wanted them in a place with a Godly woman who would become an empty vessel in which He could work. He shared this with me as I spent 20 minutes on my hands and knees on a dirty bathroom floor. I did start out washing it, but during my time down there I began to cry out to God. Through that conversation came, "Your pride prohibits you." I empty myself of the pride that fed my mind, telling me a mantra of "You ARE a good mother. You ARE a good mother...." I want to be that empty vessel that God fills up daily with what my children need, and their needs are unique only in the fact that their spirits are unique. So this day, I trust in the Lord, and I lean not on my own understanding. I acknowledge Him in ALL my ways and, because of this, He DOES direct my path.


Karolee said...

I agree with God - YOU ARE a good mother!

Bren said...

I must clarify that God never gave me the mantra of "You are a good mother" was my own. My realization is that He did not put my children with me because I am a good mother, but because I would be willing to empty myself to be used of Him. (I am a slow learner sometimes VBS)

Donetta said...

Oh sweet freedom from the ego. It is God who is good he just makes us able. What makes you so good is HIS presence within you. "The knowledge of good and evil is what got us all in this big mess :)

Niki RuralWritings said...

Dying to and simple, yet sooooo difficult, how thankful I am I have a Father who will correct, converse and love us!

Nadine said...

THANKS, Bren ! Your posts are always so much inspiring.

As a mother of 4, working ouside, I have often been looked at, as an "irresponsible" woman, in this big material society, where most women now have 1, maybe 2 children... This sometimes brought questions to my soul, and even made me feel kind of "guilty". I devoted most of my time to prove that I was a good mother, that I could cope with everything... PRIDE !(and I felt so tired and exhausted) this, until I realized - I should say "God made me realize" that I didn't have 4 children because I, me, moi, was a good person, but rather because God wanted to teach me something through my 4 children ! And THIS made all the difference !
God's messages are always very clear and lightening, as soon as we LISTEN to them, in all modesty.

With a big HUG & smiles to you !

Lindah said...

Beautif blog, Bren, beautiful!
Linda H

Darlene said...

I read your blog for daily inspiration!

I try to be a good mother but can only do what I was taught to do. Often I say that I was not a good mother, I was a good provider. Expected to be all things to everyone and yet not true to myself has been a struggle all my life.